Our society does not encourage a time to mourn.

This is for you who mourn. You may or may not be mourning a death of a loved one, but everyone has something to mourn even on a perfectly joyous day.

Strange loss…

I remember my first wedding as a nineteen year old bride, as I joyfully walked down the aisle with my new husband, yet I was strangely sad! All the months of planning the beautiful event were over. The big day would soon conclude and the flowers would wilt. The sadness was quickly dispersed by excited hugs and words of congratulations to both of us, yet I still remember the brief choke in my throat that meant loss.

Time passing is a loss.

You might be mourning the passage of time. That is a frequent visitor to me as I contemplate time swiftly passing.  I feel my body resisting things it never did before. I watch my grandchildren growing quickly. All is something to mourn.

List your losses.

In my months of mourning the death of a loved one, I was given wise advice. It was suggested I examine losses throughout my life. I listed them and carefully looked at those losses. I was asked if I’d truly grieved them. I discovered I had not. I wondered what could be more profound than the loss of a second husband in four years time.

I remembered the loss of my stillborn baby girl we named Carrie Lynn. I mourned the days I didn’t get to hold her baby sweetness. Being a little sister to her older brother and sister. The days of watching her grow into a young woman. To observe her loving another and getting married.

I couldn’t change that she wasn’t here on earth.

I mourned we didn’t have a place that said her name. I couldn’t change the fact that she was not here on earth, but  I could have something to mark she was. That helped the grief that took place thirty-three years earlier.

Carrie has a marker that says she lived a life, though very brief.

Take the time to mourn…..then you will mend.

There are numerous kinds of mourning in our lives every day. I encourage you to do as William Shakespeare recommended several hundred years ago: take the time to mourn. Then you will mend.

This verse has encouraged me numerous times in my life.

They who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength,

they shall mount up with wings like eagles,

they shall run and not be weary,

they shall walk and not faint. Isaiah 40:31

I have close friends this day who are grieving the loss of a spouse. An adult child. A best friend. I can’t take the hurt away–and I would like to. Here’s my advice for today. Wait for the Lord to renew your strength. Take the time to mourn during this season of winter. It will help you mend.  Spring is around the corner.

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