In January, I always look back to a precarious time in my history. It’s a time to remember when God was with me, in spite of the frightening days. I think of them as stones of remembrance.

“In the future your children will ask, ‘What do these stones mean?’22 Then you can tell them, ‘This is where the Israelites crossed the Jordan on dry ground.’ 23 For the Lord your God dried up the river right before your eyes, and he kept it dry until you were all across, just as he did at the Red Sea when he dried it up until we had all crossed over. 24 He did this so all the nations of the earth might know that the Lord’s hand is powerful, and so you might fear the Lord your God forever.” Joshua 4:21-24

Friday, January 27, 2006, I witnessed a near collision, helplessly following in the car behind as I watched my husband, Bill, drive his truck wildly swerving through an intersection with three lanes of traffic each way. This man, who was an excellent driver, could have hit multiple cars, but didn’t. I’ll not forget God’s protection as he straightened the vehicle just in time, while I screamed to God to help him. He had suffered a stroke, although at the time we didn’t know it.

An hour later, he was in the emergency room being tended by medical personnel. It was a stroke. There were precarious times in the next two days. And then Sunday evening, a neurosurgeon performed an angioplasty of occluded– stopped-up–arteries in his brain. After the surgery, he was immediately better. God kept him alive for a purpose. I believe it was to say good-bye to the ones he loved the most. The next early Friday morning, February 3rd, we were called to come to the ICU because he was dying. One last time I was able to whisper my love to him. I sang hymns of the faith to him, quoted as many passages in the Bible I could remember, but mostly told him how much I loved him. Our two children were there to speak of their gratitude for his love and protection in their lives. And then, he was gone.

So much happened the next few years. I was alone in a house for the first time in my life. Yet, I always felt the presence of God, in the form of the Holy Spirit with me all the time. He was with me in the lonely evenings where I formerly  had companionship and now was alone. I had lots of time to think and even worked through some regrets of the past.

And then. Almost exactly two years later, I met Blair. I never thought I could love a man like I loved Bill, but I did. We connected in so many ways. Talking about our past of music and events that we experienced in different places, yet similar to both of us. We married and had a joyful time. And then, one Friday evening, January 29, 2010, exactly four years after that precarious surgery on Bill’s brain, Blair lost consciousness and in the emergency room, the neurologist–the same one who did the angioplasty four years earlier–came to tell me there was no hope for him. He’d suffered a brain aneurysm.

I won’t tell you that I didn’t question God, in this medical catastrophe, because I did! I didn’t understand why he brought Blair into my life if he was going to take him away so soon.

What did I learn about these life-changing, challenging days? That even though it was difficult, I was not alone. I felt such peace. That didn’t mean I didn’t grieve, because I did. In the grief, God gave me hope. Little things, like hearing  birdsong outside my window the first morning of Bill’s death. It reminded me I was not alone, but alive.

My family. Dear children and grandchildren surrounding me that first week. It was like being wrapped in a warm blanket on a cold winter’s night.

At the graveside, an eagle flew overhead. Later that week, an eagle (perhaps the same one) flew over my house. My neighbor mentioned the eagle had been circling around the house all day. I felt protected and was reminded once again God was looking over me.

In another house, four years later, a robin visited me for a week right outside my window. Another reminder of God’s presence.

Mr. Robin on patrol.

There are many more stones of remembrance. How God sustained me in hard times and happy times. How another wonderful man came into my life four years later. A rock of remembrance for another time.

At our wedding on a cold December morning, we sang with those in attendance this song, one of my favorites: “Great is Thy Faithfulness:

 Great is thy faithfulness, O God, my Father;
There is no shadow of turning with thee.
Thou changest not, thy compassions, they fail not;
As thou hast been, thou forever wilt be.

Refrain:
Great is thy faithfulness,
Great is thy faithfulness,
Morning by morning new mercies I see.
All I have needed thy hand hast provided;
Great is thy faithfulness,
Lord unto me. (Thomas O. Chisolm (1866-1960).

“Father, as people read this, may they be reminded of stones of remembrance in their lives. How you were with them, in spite of aloneness and fear. I thank you for your presence with me all these years. In Jesus’ name, Amen.”

Where have you experienced stones of remembrance in your life? Write them down, and then give thanks to the Father in Heaven for his gift of presence.

Enjoy this choir rendition from Dallas, Texas.

Get these Blog posts emailed directly to you.