January means a new year. A fresh start. We take our Christmas decorations down. Actually, that’s on my agenda for today. When complete, it feels clean and fresh.
Today, I am writing to those of you who feel darkness and grief. I am not grieving right now, but I have and for me, January is a dark month, full of difficult memories.
I don’t write to make you sad, to bring back bad memories, but to encourage you that this dark sadness from loss in death and other losses will pass.
I should add they will pass, but not just by the passage of time. For me, I found it took time and tears, and a deep envelopment in God’s word.
Shakespeare quoted this verse in the play Henry VI, Part II:
Unto the upright there arises light in the darkness;
He is gracious, and full of compassion, and righteous (Psalm. 112:4 NKJV).
In the play, a man claimed to the king to have been born blind and was healed that same day of his birth and the king declared:
Now, God be praised, that believing souls
Gives light in darkness, comfort in despair (my emphasis).
I won’t tell you who are grieving this dark January morning, that our grief will immediately be gone. But in the grief, I found reaching out to God helped assuage that grief.
Some of you might say, “I’m not grieving anyone’s death.” No, you might not, but you might still be grieving. For example, you might be mourning the loss of a friendship through these days of distancing and divisiveness that seems to surround us daily. You might be grieving the loss of a career you no longer have. Perhaps you are estranged from a child. Does your marriage seems like it will never get better and it would be better to divorce? There are even simpler things than we can grieve. The short daylight. The rain (it seems to never stop here in the NW). My Jim is always sad when we take down our Christmas lights and baubles because he loves the light and brightness. I mourn the fact that my body is growing old and I can’t do the physical things that were once so easy for me. Maybe you are troubled for those who are grieving. You fill in the blank of your grief.
This Sunday afternoon, Jim and I will begin a new session of GriefShare. I know there will be those who are deep in grief and believe they will never get out of this heavy, terrible sadness. But if they reach out and dig deep, they will find comfort. First in reading God’s Word. Then looking back at memories both good and bad. Writing down words that you share only with yourself and God.
Grief and the end of it, takes time, and tears, and more tears. But it will come.
Dostoevsky said:
The darker the night, the brighter of stars;
The deeper the grief, the closer is God.
I agree with both Shakespeare and Dostoevsky that we can experience light in darkness, comfort in despair (Shakespeare), and when you don’t think it can get darker and deeper, the closer is God (Dostoevsky).
If you are grieving the loss of a loved one in death, I highly recommend finding a grief group. Check out this website.
That’s it for today. I pray you find the comfort–for any kind of loss–in reading God’s word. Perhaps finding a grief group if you are mourning the death of someone.
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