Chair for one

Chair for one? If you go to a restaurant and you ask for seating for one, do you get a strange look? Or a seat at a movie or performance. Seating for one?

I was there once, though I am not there any longer. This blog might be for you. My husband Jim and I are facilitators for a grief support group called GriefShare®. This evening is a special night for those who are facing the holidays alone–perhaps for the first time. The seminar will help those facing this first holiday alone with coping skills.

There are those, however, who are alone and have been alone for years. Just this week I was chatting with a woman who declared, “I’d just like to go to bed the day before Thanksgiving and wake up January 2nd!”

It’s OK to be alone, in fact statistics say there are more people renting apartments for one than ever before. But this person doesn’t necessarily want to be alone at holidays, it just works out that her family is far away and her husband is no longer here.

Is that you? Perhaps you don’t live alone, but you feel alone. You rarely have conversation with a spouse or roommate except to discuss what might be on the calendar for the day–or week.

This past year, I’ve been reading a devotional with the Psalms everyday. Yesterday, I read one that touched my soul. Perhaps it will touch yours, too.

The LORD will work out his plans for my life–

for your faithful love, Oh LORD endures forever. 

Don’t abandon me, for you made me. (Psalm 138:8)

I like how the writer reminded God that he was his maker, even though he was recounting God’s faithful love at the same time. That’s a reminder for us. We can talk to God in the same manner–or simply pray this prayer as your prayer.

“So what do I do now in my aloneness?” You might ask. If you attend church, you might ask your pastor or someone in the church office if there’s a family who could use someone to come alongside and provide a meal for them. Ask if there’s a new widow or widower who could use a friend to share a holiday meal.If you have family around, but are also aware of someone who is alone, invite them for your Thanksgiving meal.

I do remember my being alone. Sometimes I took myself out for dinner. I chose a table in a corner where I could observe other diners and imagine who they are and what they do. I noticed lots of couples may not be alone, but they are busy texting and looking at their phones talking to other people who aren’t even there. Essentially, they are alone, too.

As a reference to the psalm above, the study told me to go to Isaiah, the prophet. Here’s what he said:

Oh LORD, you are our father.

We are the clay, you are the potter,

we are all the work of your hand. (Isa. 64:8)

Before the beginning of time, God knew you. Knew what your circumstances would be. You–and I–are the work of his hands. He knows. He cares.

Lord, today I ask you to be with those who feel so very alone. Let them know You are there and will work out Your plans for them. Amen.