“Do you think you could turn off the blaring radio?” she demanded. I was intent on pulling weeds one afternoon not long ago. Finally, we had some sunshine and I was in my backyard, pulling the weeds that seem to love the rain and grow everywhere. I looked up, startled and quite honestly, irritated. What right had she to tromp into my back yard and accuse me of making too much noise?
“I’m sorry,” I said (not really sorry but it seemed the appropriate thing to say). She went on to tell me my radio was bothering her husband, who had Alzheimer’s, and was trying to sleep. She explained that he kept asking her to turn down their radio. Finally, in desperation, she came into my yard to make that request.
Her asking was reasonable for sure. I was irritated because of her words–“blaring.”
“Does the digging next door bother him?” I asked. You see, right next door, the other neighbor was digging a swimming pool and there was a lot of noise produced by that project.
“Well, he doesn’t like that either,” she said. I told her I would turn off my podcast and apologized again for making too much noise. She thanked me and that was the end of it.
But it really wasn’t the end of it. You see, my response to her request was wrong. Yup. Me–the child of God–the Christian, had responded in a un-neighborly fashion.
Many years earlier, I believed in Jesus and He entered my life. When He entered, I became an adopted child of God. I can now call God “Father.” Because of my faith, I become a daughter of the God of the Universe: But to all who believed him and accepted him, he gave the right to become children of God. 13 They are reborn—not with a physical birth resulting from human passion or plan, but a birth that comes from God (John 1:12-13 NLT).
With my adoption into God’s family come responsibility. I have Someone living inside me, reminding me Who I belong to. I need to live and act differently because I belong to God’s family. The perfect family who doesn’t get impatient or irritated. Sometimes–like that sunny afternoon a few days ago–I behaved like the rest of the world. Like I didn’t belong to the family.
The neighbor lady left the yard. I huffed around, continued to pull weeds–with the radio podcast off–feeling very righteous. How dare she say I was being rude! I was only giving myself entertainment while I worked. But you know what? I began to feel badly about my retort. I. Was. Wrong. I’d misrepresented my Father God and wounded the Holy Spirit living in me.
I can only describe my feelings as sad and guilty. There was a heaviness. I knew I didn’t respond in the right way, even though I said I was sorry, I really wasn’t. I told Jim about the incident and of course he was on my side. But I knew deep down I needed to make things right. I had to tell my neighbor I was sorry–yes. But the person I’d wounded the most–the Holy Spirit living in me!
I can’t tell you the relief I experienced when I realized it and told Jesus I was wrong and was sorry for my words and attitude. You know what happened next? I felt instant relief! No more heaviness. God’s word is true. In the modern version it says: If we claim that we’re free of sin, we’re only fooling ourselves. A claim like that is errant nonsense. On the other hand, if we admit our sins—simply come clean about them—he won’t let us down; he’ll be true to himself. He’ll forgive our sins and purge us of all wrongdoing. If we claim that we’ve never sinned, we out-and-out contradict God—make a liar out of him. A claim like that only shows off our ignorance of God (I John 1:8-10 MSG).
Now for my neighbor. I needed to tell her I was wrong too.
Next morning, I headed to the store to purchase a bouquet of flowers and found a beautiful one. A bright cheery yellow.
The story isn’t over. My neighbor wasn’t home, but her husband was. He seemed perfectly “normal” and said he remembered that his wife had asked me to turn my radio down. I gave him the flowers and he graciously accepted them. I gave him the bouquet with a card and my apologies. I haven’t seen her yet–it isn’t easy to get to her house–but I will.
What’s my point here? In spite of my adopted relationship to God as His child, I am not perfect! I haven’t arrived. I’ve got a ways to go. I’ll keep working on it–with the help of the Holy Spirit. I still have that response that isn’t Christ-like at all and I won’t be perfect like him until I reach heaven.
How about you? Do you sometimes struggle with your “flesh”–your un-godly response to people or situations? Thank God for the perfect One within us who reminds me when I don’t act like I belong to Him.
Maybe today, I’ll stroll to my neighbor’s place—and make sure she knows I gave those flowers to her because of my behavior. But I know for sure I am forgiven by God, and that’s the best part.
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You’re so sweet! I know that God is so good and that Jesus lives in Us and loves through us!
Thank you Deb–as you can see, I’m not always sweet. Thanks for reading and commenting. I appreciate it and you!
Love, Shirley
Oh, thank you, Shirley for sharing this vulnerable moment with us. You made me cry. I’m so grateful for your honesty and your desire for a pure heart- and your willingness to humble yourself before God, your neighbor, and your readers. God bless your encounter with that woman. May she have a sense of your Father as you talk with her… A sense of the family you come from.
God bless you on your journey. God bless me on mine. So thankful for mercy.
Love,
Kai
Oh boy, for sure I need that Spirit within me or??? I’d be a mess! Love you! Shirley