“But we don’t know for sure if we’re right for each other. What do you suggest?” he asked.

We shared our story with the couple who were in their sixties and early seventies. They both had been widowed and weren’t sure how fast they should pursue their relationship. We simply shared our story–and our book Second Chance at Love with them. The book discusses seven areas to examine before you determine if you’re right for each other in marriage. Each chapter has a questionnaire that would help the couple communicate important details before marriage.

In the final chapter of the book, we provided eight tips on how to have a charmed marriage.

What if you don’t plan to remarry, or even marry?  Perhaps you can share this blog with someone who could use some of  the suggestions we give. Every marriage can benefit from the suggestions. Even “perfect” ones.

Today, we’ll share tips five and six from that chapter.

5. Play together.

Sometimes playing together is enjoying a hobby, but it can also be landscaping a dream backyard, or remodeling your home. Planning and doing things together gives such a sense of accomplishment. Sometimes, remodeling can create more stress, but in Jim’s previous marriage, it was just the ticket for saving their marriage.

Playing together might also be attending your favorite sporting event. Most areas have at least one professional or semiprofessional team nearby, but there are always high school games to attend.

Perhaps it’s doing something you may not enjoy as much as your partner. Shirley loves hiking and Jim goes along with her though it isn’t his favorite activity. Together, you could join a community choir. Take a language class together. Take a dance class together. Go to the gym together.

 

6. Grow Spiritually Together.

It’s important in a relationship to attend church together. You may both be attending the same church, or depending on where you live, you may find a different one. In our case, Jim joined Shirley’s church when he relocated to her city. The important thing is to find a church you both feel comfortable in. Church attendance is extremely important in your spiritual growth as an individual as well as a couple. Join a small group. Volunteer where you’re needed. In your new marriage, you may get a whole new set of friends to socialize with.

And let us not hold aloof from our church meetings,

as some do. Let us do all we can to help one another’s

faith, and this the more earnestly as we see the final day

drawing ever nearer (Hebrews 10:25 Phillips).

Together, Jim and I share a passion and believe God has called us to minister to others who are grieving the death of a loved one. As we said in the introduction, twice a year we lead a thirteen-week grief support group at our church. We grow spiritually as we help individuals work through their grief and experience healing from their loss.

Read a book together that will build your spiritual muscles as well as build up your marriage. There are many devotional books available for couples to study.

That’s it for this week. Be sure to share with a couple who may not read my blog. Let me know your thoughts through the comments at the bottom of the page. I enjoy hearing from you!

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Enjoy the song from one of my favorite singers: