Last week I shared two tips for a better marriage. Go back and read, if you haven’t already.

They were:

  1.  Pray together.
  2. Communicate

I was scrolling through my Facebook feed the other day, attempting to do it quickly, when Jim walked by, “Finding anything interesting?” he asked.

Instead of answering kindly, I barked back, “No,” in a tone that told him don’t talk to me right now. He walked away, sat down in a chair and opened a book and began to read.

A few minutes later, I began to feel guilty. “I’m sorry,” I said, leaning over him in his chair. “I wasn’t kind, I shouldn’t have spoken to you that way…”

Of course he forgave me. But sometimes, we don’t say anything after snapping at our loved one. They should understand I was busy, we may justify ourselves.

This week we’ll talk about how to:

  1.  Keep short accounts and,
  2. Learn your partner’s love language.

Keep short accounts. From, Second Chance at Love:

If you’ve done something to hurt/offend your partner, be honest and apologize—don’t wait until you think it’s the right time.

If you’re bothered or offended by something your partner says or does, don’t be afraid to broach the subject.

Forgive. No one is perfect.

Appreciate often. “Thank you for the nice meal,” or “You look really nice today,” or “Thank you for emptying the dishwasher,” or “Thank you for emptying the garbage.” It’s such an easy thing to do and means a lot.

Learn your partner’s love language:

This is an excellent tool in learning how to really love your mate. After reading Gary Chapman’s book The Five Love Languages,  we learned what each of our languages were and then expressed our love in ways that spoke the way they heard expressions of love.

I learned my love language is “Acts of Service.” I heard “I love you” when Jim helped me with tasks. It could be many things such as emptying the dishwasher, taking out the garbage, filling the gas tank of the car. Jim helps me vacuum the house weekly. He’s a great sous chef, too! I love it that he clears up my messes as I prepare our dinner!

Jim learned his language is “Words of Affirmation,” meaning love notes, me telling him what I enjoy about him. Spoken words are good, but I know notes written on a piece of paper speak to him the most. I observe him using one of my notes as a bookmark and he carefully saves every one of them.

You can take the love language test for free online.

Remember, even if you aren’t married, there are people in your lives that you can apply these principles.

That’s it for tips. Next week, is Valentines. I have a special blog for you that day.

Enjoy the weekend and if you’re a football fan–and even if you’re only a once-a-year kind of fan, enjoy the game. We’re planning to enjoy and of course, root for the Seattle Seahawks! Go Hawks! We plan to watch during halftime, The Great All American Half Time Show on other stations.

“Father, I know I’m not perfect and I respond in ways that aren’t pleasing to You. Please help me to be kind to those around me, In the name of Your Son Jesus, amen.”

For fun, I’m including a song I remember singing along to many years ago….

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